I have been a Christian since I was a teenager. But as I sit here as an adult, 30 odd years later, I have felt hopelessness, a jaded outlook, a realist or pessimist, instead of the optimist I usually am. I remember my dad always saying "you can't cry over spilt milk." I'm a practical girl for whom spilt milk is an opportunity usually, to find a way to fix it and move on....
But we can get stuck in the hurts and cares and worries that accumulate over the years. More now than ever I miss the good old days, the school days, where my biggest responsibility was passing a test. Man, life is full of tests right?! Half the problem is not even realizing you're in a test. The other half of the problem is its a test you never wanted to take anyways!
I have come to realise that my attitude is completely in my hands. I can wallow in self-pity or I can look up and choose to see the good in things. I can feel sorry for myself, or I can walk closer to God, and focus on Him. I can choose hopelessness, or.... I can take a step of faith, to believe! Believe what? God's word!
So why baby steps? I think for me I have become so entrenched in negativity, and why me? and what is the point of being hopeful, its going to crash and burn anyway? that I have forgotten how to practice faith.
But.... I chose to take a small step of faith, I chose to believe a portion of God's word that said I have His favour and instead of begging for His favour in a small circumstance, I chose to thank Him for His favour. I chose to take a small step of faith and every time I doubted that things would work out, every time I sat in expectation of things to go wrong, I reminded myself that I have God's favour in this, and that I choose to believe it, and I moved on....
And... God surprised me! I suppose I should not have been surprised. I have His favour after all. His word says so. But if I do not claim it, I do not have it. So I claimed God's word, I have His favour, and stood in faith on that, speaking to my fears and doubts, and He honoured that and surprised me.
This small step of faith, and the resulting blessing, has reminded me to start checking my attitude. I have in Christ only what I allow. And if I allow only salvation, that is what I will get. But if I allow God to demonstrate His word and promises to me, I will get abundant blessing.
The sad thing is, we as Christians do experience this blessing when we take steps of faith, but it doesn't take much for us to back track into negativity and lack. We forget what God has done for us. We forget where He has taken us from, and where He has taken us to. We forget what He has lifted us out of. We forget too easily. And that is why I believe there is a lot of retelling in the Old Testament, of what God did for the Israelites. It was to remind them of His goodness, and to encourage them to believe on Him, believe that He has their best interests at heart.
Psalm 105 v 5: Remember His marvellous works which He has done, His wonders, and the judgements of His mouth.
Psalm 77 vs 11-12: I will remember the works of the Lord; Surely I will remember Your wonders of old. (12) I will also meditate on all Your work, And talk of Your deeds.
Hebrews 11 v 6: But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.
So I leave you with this thought, take a step of faith, even a small baby step, speak God's word into it and watch how He blesses and honours and rewards your faith.